moonlettuce | *wishes upon a star* (Reply)

I'm coughing, I can't sleep and I want porn.

I want to refresh my flist and find a multi-part Nick/Stephen that's heavy on the angst, heavy on the sex and absolutely with the happy ending.

I want Nick's fingers wrapped around Stephen's wrists as he pins him down, breath tinged with the harsh scent of whiskey ghosting over Stephen's neck. And Stephen knows that he could dislodge Nick easily enough but he doesn't. He doesn't because he wants it and Nick needs it and the weight across his back is grounding him more than anything has these past few months.

I want Nick dropping venom into Stephen's ear, dropping whore and slut but not asking the one thing he wants to know, needs to know. Because he wants to ask why, but he's almost too afraid of the answer to voice the word. So he'll drown the question in scotch and anger, bury it in Stephen's body with his fingers.

I want Stephen not fighting it, want him taking the pain, the anger. Because he gave them to Nick in the first place, gave them to him wrapped up in his and Helen's betrayal, and if Nick wants to give them back in the sharp twist of fingers inside him, in the feel of fingers pulling at his hair as Nick thrusts into him, then Stephen will take them.

I want it to be just the beginning. Because now they've started they can't stop. Because Stephen lets Nick take and Nick can't stop himself from reaching out. And he knows each of the bruises on Stephen's skin are signed with his name but it doesn't stop him from branding more colour into Stephen's flesh. Doesn't stop Stephen from letting him.

I want Helen to not understand why the games aren't working anymore. To not understand why Stephen's gaze passes over her and Nick's eyes look right through her. Because she'll never know that they're bonded to each other far more than they were ever bonded to her. And she tries to get to Stephen again, but every hole in his defences has been filled by Nick, and there's no room for anyone else.

I want it harsh and brutal with Nick keeping the words he wants to say inside of him. Because he'll only say them when Stephen's asleep, when it's dark and quiet and his voice is too low to be heard. And he murmurs words of forgiveness and absolution as he traces his fingers over Stephen's skin.

I want Lester to stage an intervention because he's fucking fed up of the lot of them.

And then I want a happy ending.

But most of all, I want someone else to write it for me.

I want to not have a plot line, a title, a fucking playlist.

I want it to appear on my flist the next time I hit refresh.

And I want a pony.

And maybe some sparkly lipgloss.

But mainly, I want the Nick/Stephen porn.