moonlettuce | Snippet

Because I wrote and I figured more people should be subjected to it than just the bsgslash list :)

It's never been about finding Earth, about finding the lost tribe. That's his father's obsession, Adama's blindness. The fixation of an old man who is too stubborn to admit that his life's ambition may be failure. It's not as if Adama has the excuse of the Cylons chasing them any more to spur the Fleet onwards. The militaristic machines made a fatal mistake and took on a race that was much more technologically advanced and not afraid to use it. And the nightmare that had haunted them became a memory in the touch of a button.

So these days Apollo isn't the only one asking why they've past planet after hospitable planet and ignored them. Isn't the only one asking why the children should be raised in breaking down ships following the trail of a people that abandoned them long ago.

"Pol?" He turns to see Starbuck looking at him, concern shining in blue eyes. "You okay?"

Apollo nods. "Just thinking." Treacherous thoughts about coups and Councils and how many of the warriors would back him if he actually made the move he's been considering. And the shape of another welcoming planet grows smaller in the distance. "Don't you ever get tired of it?" Fingers on the glass, covering the speck that could have represented a new chance, a new home.

"Sometimes," Starbuck admits. "But I'm a pilot."

Apollo understands the meaning behind the words. Knows that what they do is more of a calling than a career, singing out to those who want to soar in the skies before they can walk. But still, "I just want to feel grass under my feet instead of the constant tremor of metal deck plates." He can hear the unspoken words that die in his throat. 'I just want to stop running.'

But Starbuck doesn't reply. Just moves closer and wraps his arms around Apollo's waist and holds him. Apollo knows that one touch brings more peace than a thousand planets welcoming them ever could. Because for Apollo it's been about finding a home. And now here in Starbuck's arms, he realises he's had one all along.