Fairytales cannot fool me now...
Jul. 6th, 2004 09:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
moonlettuceTitle: Moments In Time: Dark Places
Episode: I've Got You Under My Skin
Author: Claire
Pairing: None, but Wesley's big gay crush on Angel is starting to show through
Rating: PG
He doesn't want to be here, in this room. Funny how a young child can make him so afraid. Only the figure on the bed isn't only a young child. Oh, he knows it's not Ryan Anderson's fault that he's possessed by an Ethros demon, and that they have to help him. After all, that's what they do, help people. But he still can't help but wish that Father Fredricks was still alive, was here to do this instead of him. Because, even as he holds the cross and recites the words he fears what Angel said in the church is true.
//You can't do it.//
Fears that he will fail.
//You've never done this before.//
Fears that Ryan will be lost to the Ethros and it will his fault. His fault, because he wasn't strong enough. "Omnis spiritus in munde. In nomine dei. Omnis spiritus in..."
"Your Latin sucks."
Ignoring the demon's voice, Wesley picks up the holy water next to him, splashing some on Ryan. "I know your tricks. You'll not deter *me* from what must be done."
"*You* do something? What makes you think you can do anything?"
//The Council has borne the brunt of your failure for the last time...//
He will not waiver, he can not waiver. "In odorem suavitatis. Tu autem effugare, diabole. Appropinquabit enim judicium dei."
"You couldn't even 'watch!' Everyone knows you got fired because you couldn't do anything right."
//You are a stain on the history of this organisation...//
"Nothing is going to make him proud of you."
//You know how to make your father happy, Wesley.//
Ignore him, don't listen. They're only words. "Skimming the surface of my mind? *Very* good. But a mere parlour trick. Here's one for you..." He thrusts the cross into Ryan's face. "How many crosses am I holding up? Omnis spiritus immunde. In nomine dei."
But the words don't stop, they keep on coming and it's getting harder to block them out. "All those hours locked up under the stairs and you still weren't good enough. Not good enough for Daddy..."
//I'll be good. Please, let me out. Father, please! Don't leave me! I'll do it, I promise!//
"...not good enough for the Council."
//You are a stain on the history of this organisation...//
"Omnis spiritus..." No, he's read that part. "Uh, that is to say."
"Lose your place? What makes you think these people want you around any more than the others did?"
And Wesley stops, because as much as it pains him to admit it, the Ethros is right. The Watchers didn't want him...
//A stain on the history of this organisation...//
And when he'd tried to contact his family after the Council had seen him his father was more than clear on how he felt...
//I have no son...//
Everything, everything that he has done has been for nought. Twenty years of his life wasted, destroyed because of what happened in Sunnydale. And if he fails in the very thing he's trained his entire life to do then what use will he be at this? How can he succeed when an experienced priest failed? And then a voice rings out in the room.
"Because I invited him here."
Turning, Wesley looks at Angel, the vampire nodding almost imperceptibly.
"Then you're stupider than he is."
Angel and Wesley's eyes meet for a brief moment...
//I'm going to be right there with you.//
Taking a deep breath, Wesley holds up the cross and starts to chant "Tu autem..."
"Go ahead, Wesley, tell him why he's a fool to trust you."
Ignore it... "Effugare, diabole."
"Tell him how you plan to kill him."
"That's not true." Only, it is true. He's a Watcher. Trained to fight creatures like Angel, trained to kill them. And it's difficult to overcome a reaction that's now more instinct than anything else. Because every time Wesley is near Angel his senses scream 'Vampire' and his mind adds 'Destroy'. But he's learning, learning to not listen to his senses and to listen to what Angel is. Not just a vampire but a man intent on helping people.
"Oh, no? He's more afraid of you than he is of me."
And once that was true. He *was* afraid of Angel. Afraid of the effect he had on the Slayer, afraid of the effect he had on the people around him. Because if you have mercy for one vampire then where does it end? And most of all he's afraid of the effect Angel is starting to have on him. Afraid of crossing the line from 'vampire' to 'Angel' to... And damn the Ethros for knowing it. "I'll show you fear!"
But as soon as he steps forward the cross in his hand flies to his neck. There's a slicing pain and all Wesley can think is, 'is this how a vampire bite feels?' As he's staggering back, feeling Angel's hands support him, the cross is pulled out and he's led from the bedroom. And Angel's speaking words to him, and he tries to focus on what's being said but all he can hear is the laughing and the knowledge that he's failed again.
End MIT: Dark Places
Episode: I've Got You Under My Skin
Author: Claire
Pairing: None, but Wesley's big gay crush on Angel is starting to show through
Rating: PG
He doesn't want to be here, in this room. Funny how a young child can make him so afraid. Only the figure on the bed isn't only a young child. Oh, he knows it's not Ryan Anderson's fault that he's possessed by an Ethros demon, and that they have to help him. After all, that's what they do, help people. But he still can't help but wish that Father Fredricks was still alive, was here to do this instead of him. Because, even as he holds the cross and recites the words he fears what Angel said in the church is true.
//You can't do it.//
Fears that he will fail.
//You've never done this before.//
Fears that Ryan will be lost to the Ethros and it will his fault. His fault, because he wasn't strong enough. "Omnis spiritus in munde. In nomine dei. Omnis spiritus in..."
"Your Latin sucks."
Ignoring the demon's voice, Wesley picks up the holy water next to him, splashing some on Ryan. "I know your tricks. You'll not deter *me* from what must be done."
"*You* do something? What makes you think you can do anything?"
//The Council has borne the brunt of your failure for the last time...//
He will not waiver, he can not waiver. "In odorem suavitatis. Tu autem effugare, diabole. Appropinquabit enim judicium dei."
"You couldn't even 'watch!' Everyone knows you got fired because you couldn't do anything right."
//You are a stain on the history of this organisation...//
"Nothing is going to make him proud of you."
//You know how to make your father happy, Wesley.//
Ignore him, don't listen. They're only words. "Skimming the surface of my mind? *Very* good. But a mere parlour trick. Here's one for you..." He thrusts the cross into Ryan's face. "How many crosses am I holding up? Omnis spiritus immunde. In nomine dei."
But the words don't stop, they keep on coming and it's getting harder to block them out. "All those hours locked up under the stairs and you still weren't good enough. Not good enough for Daddy..."
//I'll be good. Please, let me out. Father, please! Don't leave me! I'll do it, I promise!//
"...not good enough for the Council."
//You are a stain on the history of this organisation...//
"Omnis spiritus..." No, he's read that part. "Uh, that is to say."
"Lose your place? What makes you think these people want you around any more than the others did?"
And Wesley stops, because as much as it pains him to admit it, the Ethros is right. The Watchers didn't want him...
//A stain on the history of this organisation...//
And when he'd tried to contact his family after the Council had seen him his father was more than clear on how he felt...
//I have no son...//
Everything, everything that he has done has been for nought. Twenty years of his life wasted, destroyed because of what happened in Sunnydale. And if he fails in the very thing he's trained his entire life to do then what use will he be at this? How can he succeed when an experienced priest failed? And then a voice rings out in the room.
"Because I invited him here."
Turning, Wesley looks at Angel, the vampire nodding almost imperceptibly.
"Then you're stupider than he is."
Angel and Wesley's eyes meet for a brief moment...
//I'm going to be right there with you.//
Taking a deep breath, Wesley holds up the cross and starts to chant "Tu autem..."
"Go ahead, Wesley, tell him why he's a fool to trust you."
Ignore it... "Effugare, diabole."
"Tell him how you plan to kill him."
"That's not true." Only, it is true. He's a Watcher. Trained to fight creatures like Angel, trained to kill them. And it's difficult to overcome a reaction that's now more instinct than anything else. Because every time Wesley is near Angel his senses scream 'Vampire' and his mind adds 'Destroy'. But he's learning, learning to not listen to his senses and to listen to what Angel is. Not just a vampire but a man intent on helping people.
"Oh, no? He's more afraid of you than he is of me."
And once that was true. He *was* afraid of Angel. Afraid of the effect he had on the Slayer, afraid of the effect he had on the people around him. Because if you have mercy for one vampire then where does it end? And most of all he's afraid of the effect Angel is starting to have on him. Afraid of crossing the line from 'vampire' to 'Angel' to... And damn the Ethros for knowing it. "I'll show you fear!"
But as soon as he steps forward the cross in his hand flies to his neck. There's a slicing pain and all Wesley can think is, 'is this how a vampire bite feels?' As he's staggering back, feeling Angel's hands support him, the cross is pulled out and he's led from the bedroom. And Angel's speaking words to him, and he tries to focus on what's being said but all he can hear is the laughing and the knowledge that he's failed again.
End MIT: Dark Places
